Friday, 15 July 2011

How to make a blockbuster


What I learned from Transformers 3
Lesson 1: Hire a hot young actress. Apply fake tan liberally.
Cartoon Rosie Huntington-Whiteley in underpants


Hire a male lead that teenage boys can identify with
Cartoon drawing of Shia Labeouf


Shoot a variety of scenes in which hot actress is dressed provocatively

Shoot a ridiculous number of equally ridiculous action scenes
Transformers 3 makes no sense whatsoever


Ask the work experience kid to write dialogue linking the scenes together
Work experience kid with tongue out in concentration


 Add more gratuitous scenes
Cartoon Rosie Huntington-Whiteley in white again


Creative Commons Licence
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Australia License.

4 comments:

Drew said...

You blog with your mouth slightly open.

gettingpastpr said...

Well done on the Transformers drawing!

Anonymous said...

*LOVE*

And also, I'm pretty sure I've seen you wearing that hot white dress. Looking hot.

Esther said...

Optional extra: Make sure the action shots are so fast and choppy that people can't really tell what's going on, and feel slightly queasy, thereby distracting them from the fact that nothing makes any sense.

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